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| Retired NFL player Roy Simmons plans to educate women, NFL players, and others about HIV and AIDS and the dangers of being dishonest about one’s sexual orientation. (Photo by Miriam B. Coleman) |
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HOME > ENTERTAINMENT > FEATURE
By: GREG SMILEY COMMENTS
 
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out in.
I’ve known him that long. He brought me to Martha’s Vineyard to take charge
of my life and my health. He said, “I made a promise to help you, and now you
must make a promise to help others. This is my way.” It is a beautiful experience
of setting yourself free again [after] years of torture and anguish.
What is your message and how are you
going about educating people?
The message is: “Respect yourself.
Get tested. And be honest.” I’m hoping to work through seminars, the churches
and the media. Also through my Web site, www.sugarbear.info. I’ve recently
spoken with Debra Fraser-Howze of the National Black Leadership Campaign on
AIDS [in New York]. We want to work together to help resolve this situation,
and together are looking at ways to partner together.
Living life on the down low … having
relationships with women but also with men on the side. Would you say that
you were a typical representation of that lifestyle?
Yes, I was typical until 1992 when
I came out on the “Phil Donahue Show.” That was a big step for me. After freeing
myself, I have thought it important to educate women. They need to be educated,
because they’re in the relationships with these guys who are on the down low.
Some women don’t want to deal with it, just overlook it. I feel that as far
as condoms, it seems like it’s too much effort for them. But condoms, they
are the answer — they are part of the answer.
So I know you’ve had significant relationships
with women. Do you see yourself as bisexual or gay?
I’m gay [laughs]. I’m a gay black
man in America.
Do you have a partner?
Um, no [laughs] I don’t. I don’t.
Would you like one?
I would consider a significant other
but it’s not here. It’s not happening. I’m not against having someone come
into my life, but I’m not going to rush it either. When it happens, it happens
and I’ll be grateful.
What kind of person are you looking
for?
Kind. Spiritual. A hard worker. Someone
who’s honest, has self-respect, and a respect for others. All those things
come under “loving” and “caring.”
Eleven years ago on the “Phil Donahue
Show,” what was that day like?
That day, leading up to it, was a
lot of fear — fear and confusion. Then it was a sense of freeing myself.
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