Jul 16, 2004   | COMMENTS     

I’m sick of everyone thinking me and my boyfriend are so cute as a couple, but then every time we turn around, those same people are trying to get with one or the other of us. If we’re so cute together, then leave us alone so we can be happy.

Having a picture of your penis or your butt online and then saying you’re only looking for something serious is a bit ridiculous.

Why are queens so afraid and so hateful when they see someone else doing well?

How about you put down that application to the Vidal Sassoon Academy and get your ploughed little butt into college?

Does anything look less sexless than a gay guy wearing shorts with legs that are milquetoast white?

It’s really annoying when my boyfriend says he needs to “take some time” so he’s not influenced by my decisions, so he goes and hangs out with his friends and is influenced by them instead!

Isn’t it tragic when you pass out on the floor of a leather bar in your kilt with no underwear and then defecate on yourself?

Thanks for the four years. Thanks for lying to me. Thanks for my doctor telling me you gave me syphilis.

Why do the blacks get their own Gay Pride weekend? When do we get to have a White Pride weekend?

Bitch Boy responds: Probably around the same time they have a Heterosexual Pride weekend for those who are similarly threatened by the idea of a special weekend for other groups of people.

I understand the reasons for Black Gay Pride, so I support it. In fact, I’d like to expand the concept and start a “Positive Pride” for people who are HIV-positive and honest about it. We could celebrate the fact that we’re alive and not sticking our heads in the sand and pretending it’s someone else’s problem.

The downtown hotel that’s declared itself gay friendly is the same hotel where my boyfriend and I were harassed by security for sitting a little too close in their lobby one night.

Your attitude reminds me of where I work. If the employees have a complaint, it’s bitching. If management has a complaint that we don’t have Barbie doll smiles, it’s constructive criticism.

Why is it that if an open and proud gay male doesn’t agree with “Pride” events or the “gay pride” festivities, he is automatically labeled a self-hater? I’m also Catholic, white, and 6-foot-1. Where are the parades for those characteristics of my life?

Can we at least have one good place to dance? Fire the ugly drag queens and put some go-go boys up there. And no more disco. You don’t have to be Tony Moran, but play some circuit music.

Why is it that so many twits out there feel that beachwear is acceptable attire in the bars? Bars have themes for a reason. Please leave your cargo shorts and flip flops at home! You don’t two-step in flip flops!

Older guys like me (I’m 54) should be content we’ve had our good times and shouldn’t resent younger gay men. I never enjoyed having 50-ish trolls hitting on me 30 years ago, so why should these handsome younger guys feel any differently?

Who cares what the Bible says about homosexuality or anything else? I’ve read better novels!

No matter how much gel and pomade you soak in that hair, it does not change the fact you have a junior-sized penis.

You faggots out there have your fuckin’ papers out there whining about how you can’t get married. Well fuck off, you cock-sucking faggots!
Bitch Boy responds: You kiss your wife with that mouth?

It’s saddens me that we have separatist Pride celebrations. We need to be united in our Gay Pride, Black Pride, Youth Pride and Lesbian Pride. We ought to celebrate all in one, like we used to.

I’d like to know when gay people are going to stop drugging, drinking and screwing long enough to realize that we really are treated like second-class citizens.

Those who bitch about others are only exposing their insecurities and perpetuating a gay stereotype. It’s easy to bitch; try suggesting a solution while you’re at it.

I’m an attractive 40-something who’s ready to come clean. It’s true, you 20-or 30-somethings really are “all that.” The sight of you drives me into a homoerotic frenzy to where I can hardly contain myself. But I want you all to know that ...