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By: JULIE ENSZE COMMENTS
 
‘TIS THE SEASON for living room gatherings to meet, greet and scrutinize the men and women who want to represent us and have their eyes on elections in 2006 and 2008. Hopefuls for the state legislature, Congress and the White House are making the rounds in living rooms around the nation.
I was recently at one of these gatherings in a living room in Bethesda, Md. Kweisi Mfume, who wants to represent the state in the U.S. Senate, spoke to about 35 women.
I want to support him. I would love for my state to send the sixth African American ever to the Senate. I would love for it to be Mfume.
But I can’t support him until he states clearly and unequivocally that he supports the rights of lesbians and gay men to be married.
When asked to do so, Mfume equivocated, as most of our Democratic allies do. He supports recognition of same-sex relationships.
Fine, so do I. I call it marriage. It doesn’t sound like he is ready to use that word.
So I have one clear resolution as we enter the upcoming campaign season: I am not supporting any candidates for office who do not support openly and unequivocally the right of lesbians and gay men to be married.
I AM TIRED of our “friends” in the Democratic Party talking about how they agree with us on 9 things, but not on the 10th.
Of the 9, they inevitably list employment non-discrimination and hate crimes and “et cetera,” which apparently includes the other 7. The 10th is marriage.
As one lesbian activist in Maryland remarked after Mfume spoke, “I can provide my child with health insurance and an education, but if I die, I can’t provide him with real security because I cannot legally marry his other mother.”
There you have it. I am tired of Democrats taking my money and my time for elections and then blaming me and my desire to be wedded lawfully for their loss at the polls. Yes, Democrats lost in November, but it wasn’t because they supported gay marriage; in fact most of them didn’t.
It would be one thing if the party could say, “Look we really stepped out on the limb on the marriage issue and now we need your support.” But they can’t.
Or even if they could say, “Look, we have really been instrumental in getting federal legislation passed for gay and lesbian people in the past and we’ll do it again.” But they haven’t.
Since being silent on marriage equality hasn’t worked, I would recommend Democrats take the opposite approach. Can you imagine a candidate saying this:
“Yes, I support the rights of gay couples to be married, but I am most concerned about what we are going to do to help working families in this country make sure that they have health insurance for everyone in their family. I am worried about how working families will pay for their kids to go to college.
“These are the issues that I am concerned about. Still, I support equal access to marriage for gay couples.”
That is a candidate who will get my full support. I am waiting.
LET’S FACE IT, if elected officials won’t stand up for us all the time, even on marriage, why should we give them our money, time and our vote?
What will we lose by not supporting candidates — Democrat and Republican — who won’t speak strongly and unequivocally on our right to marry? Nothing.
They aren’t representing us anyway and by withdrawing our support, we get to keep our money and our time. Sounds like a good deal to me.
I felt the November loss the most when Judge Roberts was named as President Bush’s Supreme Court appointment. I know that things are better for me as a woman, a lesbian, a progressive, when Democrats are in office, but I’m tired of the bargains that come with the Democrats.
So for the next 14 months, at least, I am going to be like every dieter, alcoholic, and sex addict and swear off my addiction. Will you do the same?
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