Mar 17, 2006  | COMMENTS     

You went out to a bar after dropping me off for our date? Play on, playa!

It sucks to be a man who thinks like a woman when you like butch men. They won’t let me vent when I have a problem and insist on fixing it rather than just listening. When they give advice, and I choose to ignore it, they get pissed!

To the wannabe fashion vocab teacher: "Couture" does not necessarily mean "one-of-a-kind" or "handmade." It simply means "high fashion." Next time make sure you remove those Blahniks before you put your foot in your mouth.

You asked me if you could buy me a drink, and I said yes. That does not make me obligated to speak a word more to you. Buy me the damn drink and get lost!

You decided I am a slut for sleeping with you on the second date. What does that make you?

All over my campus straight girls have rainbow flags and "ally" buttons pinned to their bags. I never see gay male or lesbian students with that crap on. Maybe straight is the new gay. How postmodern!

Why do so many gay men think they can find someone who is better looking or in way better shape than they are? Have you looked in the mirror lately?

Honey, I’m a candy stripper. That’s someone who works in a hospital. You obviously didn’t get that when you said you don’t date strippers. Well, I don’t date dumb guys!
Bitch Boy responds: Don’t worry, honey. He probably doesn’t date poor spellers, much less candy "stripers."

The music was good until you decided to sing along.

The bitches I read here every week are the most controversial, racist, bigoted and ignorant I have ever read. Keep up the good work!

People who proclaim themselves gay don’t realize that all psychological dysfunctions include a blind spot that makes you feel "born this way." They put info like this in books. Open one.

How the hell are there 20-year-olds who still haven’t told their parents they are gay?

"Getting lucky" only means you’re fat, ugly, old or just a plain loser looking for that once in a lifetime opportunity.

If you want to hit on me, don’t insult my individuality by saying I look like some loser in Hollywood.

You’re not fuck buddies until you at least know each other’s first and last name and not some bogus name like "Candy."

It’s sad you don’t know what an amoeba is and call all people with at least a fifth grade education sluts for knowing what it is.

Bitching is good medicine. Trust it and never doubt it! A teaspoon can go a long way.
Bitch Boy responds: If sugar helps the medicine go down, what does bitching help you swallow?

When you hold a Bible or a rosary in my face and say I’ll burn in hell, I do not think that’s non-violent. It just means you don’t practice what you preach.

I never confuse actors with their screen roles, but I would like to thank Adrian Brody for saving Billy Elliott from King Kong, so now he can grow up to be Adam Cooper and dance "Swan Lake."

We met and exchanged numbers, then I called and you said, "I would like to get to know you better." Stop with the lip service and put some action behind your words by committing to plans.
Bitch Boy responds: I think he knows enough by now, Stalker Channing!

I know you’re a player and so does everybody else. Stop the insanity by denying it. Everybody can’t be wrong.

Enough with the text messages. Lose the passive aggressive behavior and use the phone like a normal person.

I live in the ‘burbs and I’m happy. If my suburban lifestyle is such a bore to you, stop calling me and coming over to my house.

I was amused I was not invited to the birthday party-—-so elementary, especially since I don’t know why I was excluded. Are your lives that boring that your only amusement is adding such drama?

The queens who don’t like "Brokeback Mountain" because it has a sad ending are the ...