Brad Brownfield of Memphis, Tenn., says the term ‘party bisexual’ is derogatory, but that its use could at least help spur discussion about bisexuality.
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JOSHUA LYNSEN
Friday, July 07, 2006
“Party bisexual,” a new term growing in popularity to describe men or women who act out bisexual urges while under the influence of alcohol or drugs is getting a mixed reception.
The term “party bisexual” can describe those who identify as straight, but demonstrate an interest in people of their own sex when drunk. The term also applies to those who identify as gay, yet hit on the opposite sex while drunk, or to similarly unexpected couplings.
Some are calling the term progressive, a new recognition that bisexuals and bisexual feelings are more common than generally acknowledged.
But others, like 35-year-old bisexual Brad Brownfield, said the term seems derogatory and stereotypical.
“It seems to stigmatize the bisexual orientation as an irresponsible, party-based orientation,” he said. “I can assure people from personal experience that being bisexual does not equal being promiscuous, or make one more likely to party.”
Brownfield, who lives in Memphis, Tenn., said the growing use of “party bisexual” could nonetheless spur new discussion about bisexuality.
“If the term ‘party bisexual’ brings the subject of bisexuality up more often, then perhaps more people will recognize that it’s an orientation of its own,” he said.
Dr. Paula C. Rodríguez Rust, a member of the International Academy of Sex Research, and author of “Bisexuality in the United States,” agreed.
Rodríguez Rust, a lesbian, said the new term could advance society’s understanding of bisexuality.
“Although this is a way of discrediting [bisexuality], it’s also a way to get people to start talking about it,” she said.
‘Gosh, I was drunk’
Rodríguez Rust said the term, and others like it, can be used to dismiss unexpected behaviors.
“It’s the ‘Gosh, I was drunk last night’ syndrome,” she said. “Basically, it allows people to be bisexual at a party, … and then sort of write that off. ‘It’s because I was at a party. It’s not because I’m bisexual.’”
But she said the term also demonstrates how some people — especially younger adults — are increasingly recognizing bisexuals and bisexual feelings.
“We’ve evolved a little bit in our thinking, and most people now recognize that bisexuality does exist,” Rodríguez Rust said.
The greater prevalence of bisexuality was documented in “The Social Organization of Sexuality,” a 1994 study led by sociologist Edward O. Laumann.
According to that study, an estimated 5.8 percent of American men, and 3.3 percent of American women, have had sexual experiences with both men and women.
The study also said that most people who have had same-sex partners have also had opposite-sex partners. Among women who’ve had female partners, about 91 percent previously had a male partner. Among men who’ve had male partners, about 95 percent previously had a female partner.
However, people who’ve had sexual experiences with men and women don’t necessarily consider themselves bisexual. Brownfield and others said that some people act out of curiosity.
“Just as everyone who may have tried cigarettes is not a smoker,” he said, “they were curious, tried it, and moved on.”
Liquid courage
People who’ve been among party bisexuals, or witnessed similar behavior, said the motivations vary.
Sometimes the behavior indicates mere curiosity. Mike Killian, a 38-year-old bisexual from Fort Lauderdale, Fla., said a game of strip poker played over drinks once pitted him against a straight friend.
During one round of betting, the man pledged to kiss Killian if he lost. Killian said the man lost that round.
“So we made out, and it didn’t go any further,” Killian said. “We spoke about it a couple weeks later, and he confessed that he just wondered what it would be like.”
Sheeri Kritzer of the Bisexual Resource Center in Boston said the term simply reinforces stereotypes.
“Bisexuals have a bad rap because of party bisexuals,” said Kritzer, who is bisexual. “It would be a good thing if it helped eliminate negative stereotypes, but I think we’ve got a long way to go on that.”
Rodríguez Rust said people shouldn’t feel compelled to use the party bisexual term, or any similar term.
“I don’t think we need to think of ourselves as something or the other,” she said. “Why does having sex with someone have to affect our identity at all? Why can’t we just express our sexuality — in responsible and safe ways, of course — just express it without worrying about what I need to call myself now?”
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