Oct 12, 2007   | COMMENTS     

NINE YEARS AGO, my son Matthew was left to die after being brutally beaten simply for being gay. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about Matt — his spirit, his passion for people, his smile and his wonderful hugs. He was my friend, my confidant — someone who saw the beauty of difference and the best in all people. Dennis, our son Logan and I miss and love him deeply but know that his legacy will continue.

And on this, the ninth anniversary of his passing, I find nothing more fitting to continue Matt’s legacy than to elevate the discussion about the real issues facing LGBTQQ youth in our country and to launch MatthewsPlace.com — a new web resource designed specifically for and with youth.

Helping lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer and questioning (LGBTQQ) young people lead healthy, productive, hate-free lives has been a core value of the Matthew Shepard Foundation from the beginning. MatthewsPlace.com was created to embody that value. With tremendous input and feedback from young people throughout its development, we’re confident that MatthewsPlace.com will be a virtual home for LGBTQQ youth. It is relevant and valuable to the experiences of LGBTQQ youth in all parts of our country — from the coasts to Middle America.

Since Matt’s death and the creation of the Matthew Shepard Foundation, I have been traveling, speaking to and meeting young people across the country.
Many of these young people — gay and straight — have reached out to me to share their stories about the pain and hurt of being teased, harassed and mistreated by their peers, community and sometimes their family members for being who they are. While it is critical for me to remind them that they are valued and that they matter — it is even more important for these young people to actually be able to live and grow up in communities feeling welcomed, accepted, and safe every day. 

LGBTQQ KIDS ARE being forced to the streets at alarming rates. It is estimated that between 20 and 40 percent of all homeless youth identify as LGBTQQ. In some urban areas, the estimates are even higher. One study estimated that half of homeless youth in central Manhattan are lesbian or gay and another estimated that 40 percent of homeless youth in Seattle are lesbian or gay.  Regardless of the specific number, it is unacceptable for one youth to be forced to the streets for any reason — especially for being who they are.

As a parent of a gay child, I find this appalling. How can any parent hurt or denigrate their child for any reason, let alone for being who they are. My son was taken from me because two men learned to hate. I certainly cannot imagine losing him by choice. Our children need and deserve better from us.

At the same time, safe and inclusive direct-service providers and homeless shelters are continually strapped for resources, funds and volunteers. Many youth-serving professionals — from New York and Los Angeles to Iowa and Michigan — are helping our youth survive, helping them get off the streets, providing them with a bed, a warm meal or simply a friendly face and a safe place to belong.

They are doing this with nearly no support from our government and very little from our own community. I am not shocked that our current president and his administration would turn a blind-eye to this problem. But I am disappointed that our own community hasn’t stepped up to address this problem. As a community, how can we let this continue?

OUR COMMUNITY HAS a responsibility to take immediate action. I call on all of us to act today. We must support our lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer and questioning youth. We must talk to our friends and family about the reality facing these young people. We must support the organizations and providers helping our youth with our volunteer time and financial resources. But most importantly, mothers and fathers must go home and hug their kids — tell them that they love them for who they are — every single day. 

Today, I invite you to MatthewsPlace.com and to share the resource with young people in your life. Helping and supporting our youth is a conversation we cannot afford not to have. It is already too late for many of our young people, but it’s my hope that it’s not too late for the next generation. As a community, our responsibilities are clear.