Breaking
news:
Sarah
Palin
is
a
fag.
Or
is
she
a
hypocrite?
Dish
often
mixes
up
the
two,
due
to
a
couple
of
prior
bad
experiences.
But
Dish
digresses.
The
Dipstick
Pitbull
loves
to
make
a
big
fuss
about
being
just
like
the
average
American.
She’s
also
less
than
charitable
to
the
gays.
But
did
either
of
those
facts
stop
her
from
wearing
a
$2,500
Valentino
jacket
for
her
big
speech
at
the
Republican
National
Convention?
No.
It
did
not.
The
New
York
Post’s
Page
Six
reports
that
Palin
actually
has
a
“secret
style
team”
that
makes
the
VP
candidate
pretty
enough
to
be
trustworthy,
but
not
so
gorgeous
that
the
evil
liberal
media
will
make
sexist
comments
about
her
makeup
skills
overwhelming
her
knowledge
of
foreign
policy.
“I
did
a
little
bit
of
personal
styling,
but
I
can’t
discuss
anything
I’ve
done
with
Sarah
Palin,”
says
an
anonymous
member
of
her
design
team
quoted
by
Page
Six.
“I’m
not
sure
which
designs
she
wore
...
anything
related
to
working
with
her
is
confidential.”
It
is
a
matter
of
public
record
that
Valentino
is
a
big
ol’
homo.
This
is
probably
going
to
be
the
closest
concession
to
gay
rights
we
get
from
the
McCain
campaign,
so
let’s
enjoy
it.
We
can
all
envy
Valentino
when
he
gets
the
best
bunk
at
the
Palin-mandated
compulsory
“ex-gay”
camp.
Does
anyone
remember
that
feeling
when
you
were
closeted
in
high
school
or
college
and
then
you
found
out
that
someone
you
knew
came
out
and
you
got
excited
about
it,
but
then
you
took
a
step
back
and
realized
that
you
wouldn’t
have
sex
with
that
person
if
your
crotch
was
on
fire
and
their
crotch
was
a
bucket
of
water?
That’s
the
feeling
Dish
had
earlier
this
year
when
Perez
Hilton
alleged
that
illogically
popular
singer
John
Mayer
was
bi
or
questioning
and
that
the
two
of
them
had
made
out
in
front
of
Mayer’s
girlfriend,
Jessica
Simpson.
And
just
when
Dish
thought
it
was
safe
to
eat
solid
food,
an
even
more
nauseating
piece
of
information
comes
ramming
itself
repeatedly
down
the
pipeline.
Hilton
appeared
on
the
Howard
Stern
show
on
Tuesday
and
said
he
had
it
on
good
authority
that
Mayer
was
really
into
anal
sex.
He’s
allegedly
been
giving
it
good
to
Jessica
and
also
indulging
in
water
sports.
And
not
the
kind
that
happen
in
a
swimming
pool.
Dish
isn’t
usually
one
to
ponder
the
sexual
positions
celebs
favor
in
their
gay
bedrooms
but
let’s
just
say
that
based
on
the
faces
Mayer
makes
when
he
sings,
it’s
a
little
hard
to
imagine
Mayer
“giving
it”
to
anyone.
While
Dish
is
sometimes
known
to
kid
(and
not
because
she
loves),
occasionally
a
ray
of
sunlight
hits
the
blackened
lump
of
Play-Doh
where
here
heart
never
was.
When
that
happens,
she’ll
say
something
nice.
And
who’s
more
deserving
of
a
kind
word
than
George
“Sulu”
Takei?
On
Sunday,
the
“Star
Trek”
and
“Heroes”
actor
married
his
longtime
partner
Brad
Altman.
The
pair
had
been
together
for
21
years
and,
according
to
the
Associated
Press,
had
the
gayest
wedding
in
the
history
of
the
world.
Apparently
they
wore
white
dinner
jackets
and
made
their
grand
entrance
to
the
strains
of
“One
Singular
Sensation.”
Dish
hears
that
Ellen
and
Portia
felt
so
threatened
that
they
commissioned
Vera
Wang
to
make
flannel
bridesmaid
dresses
and
had
a
cake
made
out
of
fish.
